(after ABC Club a few of us walk to a bar called The Squirrel Cage but it is closed. Also, Dan is leaving in a week for the Peace Corps)

KELLY: That's too bad it was closed. You could have regaled the Africans with tales from the Squirrel Cage!
BRIAND: Somehow I don't think they'd translate...

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(I'm talking to the old man regulars at the bar we're at for abc)

KELLY: How long have you been coming here?
REGULAR TOM: I don't know. Long time. (to lady bartender) How long I been comin here?
BARTENDER: I don't know. I'm not your mother. Or your wife. Ask her. She'd have a better idea since she's been pullin you out of your car for that long.
REGULAR KENNY (really old guy. peers up from his beer): How long I been comin here?
(bartender stares at him and balks)
BARTENDER: Too long, Kenny. Too long.

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REGULAR STEVE: Oh, look at this sonufabitch rollin up here. He lives five blocks away and every night after work he drives his big ol station wagon five miles an hour into this place, sits at the end of the bar, gets just sloshed, plays "shake of the day" for about three hours and then drives five miles an hour the five blocks home. Sometimes his wife has to come out to get him out of his car.

(a little while later when the guy is sitting next to him I bring this up)

KELLY: I hear your wife has to get you out of your car sometimes.
REGULAR TOM: Yuup. Had to call the wife with this here cell phone and she and my daughter had to pull me out.
KELLY: If you just live five blocks away why don't you just walk home?
REGULAR TOM: Well, my dear, because I'm too drunk to walk!