Boston

MAGGY: In my cohort we were setting norms, and everyone was sick of people saying "piggyback," like "to piggyback on what he was just saying..." so instead we say "goatfront." "I'm just gonna goatfront on what was said..."

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KELLY: I think Simon is way WAY cuter than Garfunkle.
MAGGY: You can't even compare the two, Kelly. Comparing Simon and Garfunkle's looks is like comparing my vag hole to my ass hole.

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(we've been making fun of my Keen sandals and calling them "lesbian shoes" all weekend)

LAURA: ...and when you go to the Roosevelt exhibit, you see pictures of Elenor and her "knitting partner." You should see her "knitting partner." She's wearing lesbian shoes and it's like 1920.

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KATY: So what kind of Asian are you?

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

KELLY: What are Dan's longtime career goals?
MAGGY: This is so Dan. So I asked him this one day and he thought about it, and do you know what he said? He wants to be the President of the United States! And I was like, "oh my god my boyfriend is six!" And he was like, "Well what are your goals?" and I said, "Well if we're playing that game I'd like to be Oprah."

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CHICK: What's this "Freedom Trail" thing? Is it like some kind of underground railroad shit?

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KELLY: Ohhh! The "Life is Good" store! Let's go there!
LAURA: Umm...are you sure you're not a lesbian?

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(we're at the "make way for ducklings" statues. Moms keep trying to get their kids to smile for the camera)

LADY: Were you next?
LAURA: We'll be quick. I'm pretty sure she'll smile when I tell her to.

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(tourguiding)

LAURA: And to the right here is the hospital that misdiagnosed me with gonnorhea on my throat.