June 2002: part deux -

LUKIE: And I think I tried to get into their car too. Either that or I tried to get into their house with my car key- cuz the next day my car key was all bent to shit.

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BRE: I do *so* know a gay person! I know that Katie girl.

KELL: Katie's different. She's transgender.

BRE: What's that?

KELL: she had a sex-change operation. (blank stare from brenna) Like now she has a penis.

BRE (horrified) : WHO DID SHE GET IT FROM?! Could she pick like "small", "medium", or "large"?

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KATIE OB: I'm wearing leopard underwear.

KELL: I'm not so much into the animal print thing

KATIE OB: Well, I know. We're Irish. We're more into tweed.

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KATIE OB: don't tell anyone what I just told you, okay?

KELL: I don't even talk to that group

KATIE: well, I know. Just don't tell Jonny Lange.

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GIGI (elderly lady I work for) : I'm glad you're here, cuz I didn't want him (her husband) hanging around here all night.

KELL: why's that?

GIGI: You'll find out later. When you're married.

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MOM: A priest that gave dad some of his first recommendations just got accused of being involved with young boys.

KELL: that's probably why he liked dad- they way he acts reminded him of an 8th grade boy.

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DAD: Kelly, your greatest downfall is that you have mercedes taste and a volkswagon budget.

KELL: Well you're the one who raised 3 daughters with mercedes taste.

DAD: I know. My only hope is that at least one of you will take my advice and stand outside of the medical library with a short skirt on.

AMY: or we could be *inside* the medical library

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KELL: Remember that guy I talked about that I dated second semester?

LEAH: Yeah

KELL: guess who he is.

L: Is he in this room?

K: yes

L: does he have facial hair?

K: yes

L: is he the one I thought was gay until this very moment?

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KELL: one of the reasons I liked him was because he was open with his sexuality.

LEAH: Which is what? fluid?

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KEV: I was watching Martha Stewart the other night and she was talking about how to best wash your cat.

KELL: did you really just say that sentence?

JARED: What'd they say? Stick it in your dishwasher?

NIC: You put your cat in the dishwasher?

KELL: Nicole! he was joking!

NIC: Oh. Well...haven't you ever put your cat in the dryer?

WHOLE CAR: WHAT??

NIC: No, I don't mean on purpose...you just accidentally stick it in there with the laundry.

JARED: No, I think that's just you.

NIC: so how did martha say to wash your cat?

KEV: No. I'm not participating in this conversation anymore. It can't go anywhere but down.