January 04, 2006 - Stressed about Relaxing
KEVIN: There's this guy that I work with that's like Napolean Dynomite. The reason he's like Napolean Dynomite is because he'll be like "I got into Harvard but I decided not to go there" and I'm like "and what then you went wolverine hunting in alaska?"

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KEVIN: This guy would just not believe me that (some country) sets their currency to the US dollar. It's like "ok there are two kinds of questions in the world- those you can look up on google and those you can't. This is one of those questions you can easily google."

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(I'm trying to read "Rise of the Creative Class" based on Matt and Kevin's recommendation)

KELLY: Wow Kevin- that's so creative class!
MATT: Kevin's SO creative class.
KEVIN: The creativity is just dripping off of me so much that you could mop it with a....(long pause)
KELLY: A mop?
KEVIN: Yeah. A mop.
KELLY: That wasn't very creative.

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KELLY: After watching season two of the L Word, seriously, John, the best thing you ever did for me was tell me not to buy that poncho last year.
JOHN: Yeah I remember that conversation. I was like "what IS a poncho?" and you tried to explain it to me and I didn't really get it but I was like "I don't know Kelly. That doesn't sound very good."
KELLY: And thank god for that. If it weren't for that I would have been walking around Madison last year in a giant poncho looking like Tina carrying my lesbian's black baby.

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JOHN: I got yelled at for leaving dishes in the kitchen. I wonder if it's like the GRE- like leaving the dishes in the kitchen is to verbal lashing, as leaving dishes in the living room is to public hanging.

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DAD: You speak spanish fluently now?
CARRIE: pretty much.
KELLY: Oh! say something in spanish!
CARRIE: No. There that was spanish.

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(about my massage)
KELLY: Well, ONE: I get stressed out about relaxing.
MATT: That should be your motto. You should have that scroll at the bottom of your blog.

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(Steve was my massage therapist. It's 20 minutes after I got home from my first massage and it's quiet at my house)
KELLY: I miss Steve.

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(matt bought a giant pillow at Ikea that's 28" x 28" and they don't sell a lot of pillowcases that size anywhere)
KELLY: Well, did you try to go online?
MATT: Yeah, but I don't want to invest that much in a pillowcase.
KELLY: I've already invested more in this conversation about a pillowcase than I'd like to.

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Kelly: When I first came to Milwaukee I didn't know what a grill was.
Trudy: What's a grill?
Kelly: It's that gold and stuff that men put on their teeth.
Trudy: Oh. Ron has a grill.

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(this boy really likes amy but she doesn't like him and he won't take a simple no. She reads his away message and it's song lyrics that say stuff like "I shared your dreams, I shared your bed blah blah...")
AMY (to boy via IM): We never did any of that.

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DAD: I saw your boyfriend at the bowling alley today.
AMY: Did you tell him to shoo?
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(after reading amy's online conversation with above mentioned boy)
KELLY: What's a slore?
AMY: Slut slash whore.

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(Dad's opening mail)
KELLY: Come on, dad! How come you always want to hang out with Amy? Let's hang out!
DAD (after looking at a piece of mail that's a parking ticket I incurred): This! This is why we can't be friends! (gets up and leaves room)
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PUBLIC ASSISTANCE LADY: Okay and what's your roommate's birthdate?
KELLY: Oh gosh, I don't know. It's not on that form?
PA LADY: No.
KELLY: Um, well, do you want me to call her?
LADY (obviously perterbed): Just guess.
KELLY: Guess?
LADY: Like we know she was born in 1981 because she's 25.
KELLY: Okay...
LADY: Nevermind I'll do it.